Annoyances

Are people not allowed to get annoyed anymore? Worse, are we not allowed to express that annoyance? This is ridiculous. I got annoyed this morning, started talking to myself and asking a couple questions to figure out why I was annoyed- because I figure, if I don't have a legitimate reason for this feeling then get rid of it right? I ask a question to someone else, they don't know the answer, I don't hear them, I ask them, "What?" they repeat it, with an annoyed tone, and then I ask another question but this time to myself, I heard him answer but I wasn't talking to him so I ask, "What?" and I get yelled at, and then told that I need to check myself. Seriously? Wasn't that what I was just doing? Wow. Now I have become so much more annoyed and quite frankly, mad. It isn't safe for me to talk to myself. Would it be overly immature to give the silent treatment? That's what I really want to do. I want to leave the house and just be on my own, blow off some steam, and I want him to apologize. I've been working on apologizing for things... I'm horrible at it. I have figured out the reason though- to me an apology is talking and realizing you're wrong even if you don't verbalize the "I'm Sorry" Isn't it inquired when you're saying, "Hey I was wrong, let's move past that..." I thought it was. Apparently you have to say the words "I'm sorry" for it to mean anything... Yet growing up, actually til this day, my mom has said I'm sorry so many times I've lost count and practically every one of those sorry's was a load of horse manure. So I'm sorry I take that sentence for what it's value has been taught to me by my mother, which is NOTHING. I take action as the apology. Although I like to hear the words I'm sorry from people other then my mom. Maybe they actually mean it, partially. Does banging things around fix a problem? I think not. I'm fairly calm when I'm mad. Seems to get to people, my calmness. They could learn a few things huh?